Hooray for Puddleglum!

Monday, September 29, 2008

I've read the most fantastic speech tonight. The boys and I are in Chapter 12 of Lewis's Silver Chair, and the Marsh-wiggle has just given a speech that I can't help crying "hooray" to!
He speaks to an evil enchantress:

"One word. All you've been saying is quite right, I shouldn't wonder...I won't deny anything you've said. But there's one thing more to be said, even so. Suppose we have only dreamed, or made up, all those things--trees and grass and sun and moon and stars and Aslan himself. Suppose we have. Then all I can say is that, in that case, the made-up things seem a good deal more important than the real ones. Suppose this black pit of a kingdom of yours is the only world. Well, it strikes me as a pretty poor one. And that's a funny thing, when you come to think of it. We're just babies making up a game, if you're right. But four babies playing a game can make a play-world which licks your real world hollow. That's why I'm going to stand by the play-world. I'm on Aslan's side even if there isn't any Aslan to lead it. I'm going to live as like a Narnian as I can even if there isn't any Narnia. So, thanking you kindly for our supper, if these two gentlemen and the young lady are ready, we're leaving your court at once and setting out in the dark to spend our lives looking for the Overland. Not that our lives will be very long, I should think; but that's a small loss if the world's as dull a place as you say!"

"Oh hurray! Good old Puddleglum!" cried Scrubb and Jill.

I sometimes dream of ridiculous, far-fetched things too. In the moments when i choose to resist this dark world's vile enchantments i remember and believe in things like true unity and sacrificial love, the kind of commitment that would lay down it's own life before betraying a friend. I believe in things like love deep enough to drive out fear; love so large it can cover another's sin and shame and heal brokenness. I even believe in forgiveness that actually sticks. And perhaps the enchantress is right. Perhaps we only imagine these things. Maybe they're not really possible. It certainly would seem so...I have spent many years believing in them and have suffered many an unjust wound when love wasn't what it promised...what I believed it could be. But Puddleglum is right too. Even if I only imagine the kind of things I think Jesus died for, the imagination is a good deal better than the world we've created here and seems a great deal more important. The kinds of relationships we're bound to keep in this place aren't worth living or dying for, but that other sort of love? ...that sort of love would be worth everything...even if it meant living for only a very short time in this dark place.

I shall be on Aslan's side even if there is no Aslan. I shall live like a Narnian even if there is no Narnia. I shall spend my life looking for Overland even if that means my life shall be short!

And I shall do my best to wear with grace the scars that come from living so. :-)

Tonight I asked Steve for some advice. I have to face a tough situation tomorrow. His advice was gold.
"Remember who you are. You're the girl who wants to give kindness for unkindness and love at all costs."
He's a genius. I told him to remind me who I am more often. Sometimes this world's poison muddles my thinking too. But I'm a Narnian, it's true.

Remember who you are.

Those Romans and Hebrews...good peeps, both!

Wednesday, September 24, 2008

So I can't resist posting today's verse of the day. I'm thinking whoever is picking these verses to post might actually be reading my mind :-)

“So do not throw away your confidence; it will be richly rewarded. You need to persevere so that when you have done the will of God, you will receive what he has promised.”
Hebrews 10:35-36.

The prize goes not to he who runs fastest but to he who lasts longest!
Failure is only failure when you don't get up and try again.
Patience is genius.
...and all those other motivational quotes (grin).

my stupidity (confidence) will be richly rewarded.

Thanks Romans

Tuesday, September 23, 2008

I was told the most encouraging thing today.
I keep the verse of the day on my iGoogle page and this morning it was Romans 5:3-4...you've heard it a million times. I think I probably quote it to myself everyday, but today I saw something I hadn't seen before. It says:
"Not only so, but we also rejoice in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope.”

ok. so...I'm often told how stupid i am for continuing to hope in an absolutely hopeless situation. (They don't actually call me stupid...my friends are much nicer than that...but I get what the silent shrug means...it means, "i think you should just put it behind you and move on. Enough is enough, it's not worth your effort." or something like that. I've probably even given them the same shrug before.)

But do you see the little nod that Romans gave me today? We suffer and that produces perseverance and then the perseverance turns into character...and then...when you've got character...you get hope. The hope comes from the character. So perhaps the fact that I have the capacity to remain hopeful in this situation actually means that I am a woman of character?

I hope so. ;-) (chuckle)


Tuesday, September 16, 2008

by Alanis Morrissette

Oh perilous place walk backwards toward you
Blink disbelieving eyes chilled to the bone
Most visibly brave no apprehended gloom
First to take this foot to virgin snow

I am a magnet for all kinds of deeper wonderment
I am a wunderkind oh oh oh oooooh
And I lift the envelope pushed far enough to believe this
I am a princess on the way to my throne

Destined to serve, destined to roam

Oh ominous place spellbound and unchild-proofed
My least favorite chill to bear alone
Compatriots in place they'd cringe if I told you
Our best back-pocket secret our bond full-blown

I am a magnet for all kinds of deeper wonderment
I am a wunderkind oh oh oh oooooh
I am a pioneer naive enough to believe this
I am a princess on the way to my throne

Destined to seek, destined to know

Most beautiful place reborn and blown off roof
My view about-face whether great will be done

I am a magnet for all kinds of deeper wonderment
I am a wunderkind oh oh oh oooooh
I am a ground-breaker naive enough to believe this
I am a princess on the way to my throne

I am a magnet for all kinds of deeper wonderment
I am a wunderkind oh oh oh oooooh
I am a Joan of Arc and smart enough to believe this
I am a princess on the way to my throne

Destined to reign, destined to roam Destined to reign, destined to roam Destined to reign, destined to roam.

I was making a playlist tonight of some of the songs i just have always really liked. This is on it. I find this song so fascinating...i think because it is so strange and cryptic and at the same time expresses so many of the deeper things I know and believe of myself.

I am a wunderkind.
A princess on the way to her throne
A ground breaker naive enough to believe this
A Joan of Ark smart enough to believe.

I am destined to reign...and destined to roam.

Reminding myself that these things are true of me (whether I want them to be or not) helps me feel a little less crazy.

Wrapping up summer...

Sunday, September 07, 2008

I know, I know...it's time I post something new.

What though? I don't have anything deep at the moment...I mean, I could share my recent lessons, but they might not be encouraging. I like to be encouraging. But perseverance is hard. And it takes so long, darn it.

I have some really cute pictures that Sandy and Lori might like though. I love this time of year...truly. We're getting our last amazing summer days, and soon the leaves will burst out in color. It will be too chilly in the morning to go without a sweater and so hot in the afternoon that you forget to bring it home with you, and the sky will be October Blue (it's a color all it's own...my favorite one). My favorite season is almost here. I realized this year that i am very much looking forward to the years ahead. You know how a writer will refer to their character as "in the spring of her life", meaning young and new and how the "winter" is old age? I actually think fall is the richest, most beautiful and precious time of the year. I also love that time of day just before dusk when the sun stretches low, peering through evening windows and lighting up small winged things like they're lightning bugs...that time when you can hear the crickets just beginning to tune their instruments and mommies are calling "dinner"! I feel so alive right then...in that kind of shadow and sunlight. I think the "evening" of my life will feel that way...you know, that "all is quite well" feeling? I don't have quite that sense of well-being today. I've had a heavy burden of losses in the past couple of years and, as anyone who has lost someone knows, season changes are hard. This one is being hard, but i know it won't always be so.

At any rate, here are the pictures we took on one of these really fantastic "last days of summer" when we all got to go to the pool and play with our friends! Ben and Brynne stayed 'til late that night and loved every moment...even though Ben had told me flat out when I came to pick him up that he "wasn't coming!" He did. We had a blast! And we even got to catch up with our dear old friends Tim and Lori. First Sandy, then Lori, 8 kiddos...then 5 and an impromptu lawn party, dinner, conversation...a promise to Lori that I will make her a GOOD mojito next time. What a lovely day.

oh yeah...and here's my gorgeous guys on the first day of 3rd and 5th grade! (I love the "kevin wright" hair-flip on them :-) )